I was once told by someone who read my hand for free (I don’t pay for that kind of thing because I’m too cheapskate… haha!) that I’m the kind of person who chooses her friends carefully. I never thought of myself that way but when I looked at my friends, it’s true. I think it stems from the different difficult friendships I had; I had in my time friends who claimed they were my friends but were the first ones to backstab me when the opportunity arose. I won’t go into details. But I think since then I’ve been a lot more careful about who I choose to be close to.

Can’t say that I always get my choices right all the time though. Because the thing about me is that I tend to give people the benefit of the doubt. And when I trust, I don’t hold back on the trust. So I guess that’s why it’s difficult for me to understand why people can claim they’re close to me and yet hold things back from me. Oh, I don’t expect them to divulge every secret. Good God, I don’t do that. Everyone needs their own privacy. Hell, I certainly do. I’m talking about the most basic bits of trust. The most basic things that close friends should know about each other.

I told a close friend about something that I would love to do. It was something I was working hard towards as well. It was something that was quite costly to do, but it was something I was prepared to work hard for and save for it. The next thing I knew, that friend went and did that thing with others, and told me about it only afterwards. And what made it worse was that none of the people who were involved had any interest in it. It was only because they could afford it.

Do I feel betrayed? Yes.

Hurt? Yes.

Have I forgiven? Oh, I forgive, but I don’t forget.

You live, you learn. You choke, you learn. You laugh, you learn. You chose, you learn. You live, you learn.

This entry was posted on Thursday, September 6th, 2007 at 10:54 pm and is filed under Me, myself and I. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.